2014 - Thankful.... Day 9

35 years ago, today, my mother gave birth to me. Without her existence, I wouldn't be here. I imagine I used her bladder as a trampoline at one time... I imagine she caressed her belly when she felt those late night flutters of toes scrape across her insides... I imagine she worried whether I'd be perfect, or if I'd be born unhealthy. I imagine I stressed her out and pissed her off... scared her... made her cry tears of joy... I imagine I made her heart full when she first laid eyes on me. I imagine these things, because it's what I as a mother have gone through.

I wouldn't wish our relationship on anyone else. It's full of defeats. Our bond isn't as strong as it could have been. We've both said and done things that we'll always regret. We've forgiven, forgotten, and repeated felonies of the heart.

One thing is certain, however... my relationship with my mother is ours. We can make it, we can break it, we can repair it... Other people can weigh in with advice and opinion, but this relationship, as riddled with issues as it is.... is ours. I can't forget the bad things... they hurt, and they linger and they come and go. But, I can't forget the good things either - and there are many. My mother loved me... and that counts for something.

Thank you, mom... for everything.